The transition to the teenage years along with the massive clashes that follow are often the toughest periods for a teen as well as their parents. Teenagers are at a strange age where their body is changing with hormones raging leading to some very dumb behavior. Teens are expected to act like an adult but are treated like children in most cases so the frustration for many teens seems to be justified. Strict parenting does work but this is not parenting that yields positive results for many teens with a rebellious streak. Compromise can go a long way which will be discussed further later below. Taking an honest look at your parenting strategies and rules can allow you to see where you might be coming up short. The following are tips to help parents dealing with their first teen that has a rebellious streak.
Allow Them To Revamp Their Room To Match Their Style
The room of a teenager is their personal space so allowing them to decorate it accordingly can be a cool thing to do as a parent. Give them a reasonable budget and allow them to paint the room if they would like or hire an expert to do this. Tea Berry, a company of Colorado Painters, notes “Learning how colors can affect your mood and behavior can be a very powerful piece of knowledge.” A teen will most likely just put up a few posters though but will appreciate that freedom to do this. Creating their own space will allow them to feel like it represents them rather than keeping the same paint job from their infancy.
Rules Should Be Written Down Instead Of Implied
Parents at times do forget when they told a teen to be home or what was permitted left alone for a long weekend. Writing these things down hold both the parents and teen accountable rather than a parent that changes the rules when it benefits them. A system of punishment that allows for a few mistakes that are written down will be useful as well. Going crazy every time a rule is broken is not going to help as it will make your teen that much more sneaky to avoid unreasonable reprimand.
Compromising Is Not Losing For Either Side
There is going to come a time where making an exception can be done in the cases of special events. Staying out past curfew on nights like that of homecoming or a birthday can be tolerable as long as they do not turn into a regular occurrence. Curfews tend to be a huge point of dispute between teens and their parents as teens seem to want to stay out until all hours of the night. Most states have laws about teenage drivers and what times they can drive that can be of huge help to a parent. A teen does not want their license to be suspended as this will immensely reduce their independence most teens crave. Compromise does not mean either side lost but rather both sides won!
Base Freedom On Factors Like: Grades, Sports, Extracurriculars, And Friends Picked
Freedom being based on something important like grades can encourage good grades which are a sign of responsibility. Studying and planning out assignments in today’s demanding curriculum is something that should be rewarded. Sports and other activities that can help a teen get into a college or receive a scholarship also should be given extra freedom. Teens that feel like they have a lot to lose will act far more responsibly and surround themselves with people in the same position. Friends are a huge indicator of how a teen will act so basing freedom on this is important as well. A teen with friends that always seem to be in trouble should have tighter rules than a teen who hangs out with the valedictorian and community service director.
Talk To Your Teen Honestly About Drugs And Alcohol
Talking to your teen honestly about drugs and alcohol is important. This is not a place to compromise on your personal beliefs as everyone has different experiences with alcohol and drugs. A family that has a history of alcoholism or addiction might take a far stricter approach to things like teenage drinking or smoking marijuana. Although marijuana is seen as harmless by some it is important to let your teen know it can have a negative impact on things like productivity. Jobs that teens often get drug test so this could prevent them from getting that summer job that they would have really enjoyed with their friends. Substance abuse impacts every walk of life so talk to your teen immediately if you suspect they are developing an addiction as acting fast can make all of the difference.
Dealing with your first teen with a rebellious streak is going to be far more difficult for parents than a model teen. Take the time to assess how you can start being a better parent to your teen as you want to be the best parent possible!