So as you may or may not know after my middle child, Gab had major brain surgery she changed quite a bit. Her surgery was in November 2007 so not yet a year ago. She woke up from that surgery, angry… She gained aggression, strong impulsiveness and actually in many cases has been violent. Due to all these changes and just the fact that she isn’t exactly the same child she used to be for five years I have sought out changes in my parenting. After having three children who each are very different I have come to learn you can’t parent them all the same. What works for one doesn’t work for the other. In Gab’s case what used to work on her doesn’t work anymore. She almost came out of surgery with this careless attitude. Grounded from toys? Who cares… Sit in time out? Who cares… Go to bed early? Who cares… There have even been the times where we can’t finish a movie at the theatre, we can’t go to the theme parks for fun, she has even preferred to stay home in her room and is ready to stand up and fight like she is a grown man. Many say; well she had brain surgery, think of what she has been through, I would be mad at the world myself… But it’s hard for everyone. Her, her siblings and I suffer from her new found demeanor. Although on a positive note, I will admit that today, September 1st it is a LOT better then what it was last November.
Well we do play therapy, Gab sees a psychiatrist, I have watched several doctor recommended videos and finally the most recent class I took was Love and Logic. This course was a two day class that I took the past two Saturdays. First I want to say that it is great. Honestly… I loved it. I plan to take it again, and again and again. One reason is like the old saying “hard to teach an old dog new tricks” there was so much info to take in. Becoming a love and logic parent is pretty picture perfect to tell you the truth. Something I am not, YET, okay I know, I’ll never be the perfect parent (if one exists). But either way I am really wanting to try the whole: don’t stress, don’t raise your voice, don’t argue with the kids thing. LOL Okay it is still kind of funny to think I can accomplish that but hey I said I want to TRY… There were a lot of really good ideas and points made in this class. I really do encourage mothers of all types to take it. One part that was my favorite is when we discussed the three different types of parents. There are the Helicopters, the Drill Sergeants and the Consultants. Of course learning the Love and Logic process makes you want to become a consultant parent. I think consultant parents must have low anxiety levels, which I do not. LOL I hope once everything returns to normal around my house (if there is such a thing) or maybe just calms down from the surgeries and chaos that I can become a consultant. Until then I will continue to try the new strategies and work at becoming a love and logic parent.