During those bleak, and heart-rendering moments when your close friend, or family member, has suffered the loss of a loved one, everything stops. Overwhelming grief suddenly permeates every particle of his or her existence. Grief is a natural response, but it is very all-consuming. Your life changes too. You now become a caring observer of one of the greatest challenges in life, overcoming sorrow.
See Suffering and Not Doing Anything? Not Happening Here!
This is the moment, this is the day, when friendship and fealty are tested. Your thoughts are consumed by one question, and a myriad of possibilities. The goal for you, now, is to bring solace, of a tangible kind, to the grieving mourner. You must help, this valued person, if possible, and over time, to seek the healing that culminates in acceptance.
Gifting; A Two-Fold Purpose
Ironically, gift giving to those who grieve is the most necessary, and the most difficult action to be taken, simultaneously. Giving needs to have significance and demonstrate the depth of your loyalty and caring concern.
Gifts, given in moments of grief, are symbolic of love and support. They serve a two-fold purpose; helping the griever heal, even in incremental ways, and honoring the memory of the deceased. Grief experts have concluded that gifts are tangible signs of strong, emotional reinforcement. The gift, accompanied by a heart-felt, short, and sincere note of sympathy, expresses your very personalized wish to console this person, and reduce their suffering.
Gifts of Comfort
Sympathy Gift Baskets – Non-perishable, delicious snacks, represent sustenance, and are a beautiful, nutritious, and kind distraction for the immediacy of what is happening. Offering pretty, sympathy gift baskets, overflowing with sweet and savory unique treats, is a beautiful gesture. You know which wine and caramels the recipient favors. This gift emphasizes your personalization of treats of choice, just for them. It is literally, a loving “communication” through feeding.
Weighted Blankets – Offer self-care on a whole new level. It surrounds the recipient in cottony softness and feels very much like a loving hug. Research has shown that warmth, and a weight of from 3 to 30 pounds, naturally converts serotonin into melatonin within the body, inducing a sense of calmness and serenity. This blanket promotes rest during this tumultuous time, and reduces the stressors, that deep grieving creates.
Gifts of Help and Self-Care
Yoga – A healing gift which generates calmness to restore well-being. A Grief Yoga, or Classic Yoga virtual class, instructs its attendees in the art of blending breathing and movement, for emotional release. Coping tools are explained, and practiced, for venting feelings, and releasing fear, anger, remorse, and survivor guilt. All of these feelings are normal reactions to the trauma that grief instills. Calmness and healing will be activated with instruction, and can be practiced privately, after mastery.
Gifting Prepared Meals – Providing copious amounts of energy. There are a multitude of formal activities which must be completed at warp speed, when someone is lost. A gift that alleviates the everyday tasks, to offer “free time”, is very much appreciated. Choosing a selection of prepared meals, and having them delivered to the door, is a fantastic gift. They will only require refrigeration, warming to be eaten, or to be frozen for future use, when needed. This gift offers the recipient time for handling legal matters, paperwork, financial issues, and an opportunity to plan a memorial. How often does anyone receive a gift of time in the 21st Century?
Gifting Sessions from the Headspace App – This appis a guide, as the recipient learns the practice of meditation. Being instructed in ways to return to a calm state, while healing from the triggers that grief can cause, is a priceless gift. Meditation offers an opportunity for rediscovering yourself. Being tutored in the methodology, removes the frustrating setbacks that occur when practicing self-care, without the tools for personal achievement and relaxation.
Gifts of Knowledge and Honor
Gifting a Classic Book About Grieving – A “good read” for all those in mourning is “A Year of Magical Thinking,” written by author Joan Didion.The book addresses: angry, and fearful feelings, Joan’s experiences with sudden loss, what grief takes from mourners, and what it ultimately gives back. To read it, is to understand that all grief is unique to the mourner. All healing is possible, when knowledge, and self-care combine for improvement.
A Gift to Honor the Departed
A Star in Their Name – Naming a star in a constellation after the loved one who is deceasedis an incredibly special remembrance. The star registration website assists you with the choosing and registry of the star, in honor of deceased person. The team inscribes the name given to the star on a special celestial certificate of authenticity. Unique and personalized text is added about the honoree. The constellation in which the star resides is personally chosen. The star will be one that is visible almost nightly, from the location of the recipient’s home. Star gazing will forever hold extra meaning for all who mourn the departed loved one.
The Power of Grief
There is not just one singular and standard, typical response to loss. Grief activates a veritable roller coaster of emotions which consume the mourner, until he or she feels ready to get back to the process of living.
While grief is an inevitable part of human existence, coping with it, is a learned procedure. Full healing is perpetually ongoing for either a year, forever, or somewhere in between. The gift, chosen with love, gives the beginnings of solace to grieving lives.